jueves, 7 de mayo de 2009

Never been there

You say it feels fine, but how would I know if I've never been there? You say that the good times outnumber the bad times and can beat them single-handedly. But how would I know? I have never been there. You say that it's way better than good, even thought you miss it. How would I fucking know?
Am I fine? Well I guess I am. But how would I know? Mayhap I think this is fine, when it would be a living hell to you, burning your very soul from the inside, turning it to ashes, and ashes to weariness, weariness to loneliness, loneliness to a feeling of being useless. But how would I know? Have I ever been there? Have I ever got past the fucking checkpoint? Have I ever gotten past the motherfucking door at the end (beginning) of the hall?

Charon won't let me pass, I have no obolus to pay him with. None gave me one before leaving. I won't linger there no longer, and I won't suffer crossing the Acheron; I would lose myself forever. But am I not lost already? Perhaps I need to go back and find someone who would give me the coin that everybody gets; someone who'd help me pay my eternal voyage at the end of the clearing. But how would I know? I've never been where they all got it. Maybe when I get there I won't need to leave so soon. Maybe it is all true. Maybe the good beats the bad and covers all the cracks.

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